Adios Portland!

Well, things are about to get crazy here. I probably won't be around near as much as I usually am. Our little family is going to make a big change-- and I think that it will be for the better. We are going to be moving to New Orleans in September. Raph has accepted a position working on the oil rigs down there and we are all moving. I think this is going to be the fresh start that our little family has needed for a long time. Not only are there job opportunities down there that we simply don't have in Portland, but educational opportunities for Hail and a cheaper lifestyle. Everything is incredibly cheap down there. We have found beautiful houses that are hundreds of square feet larger than the apartment we rent for the same price. Absolutely crazy. Wish us luck! it will be a journey.

Happy Dance

The last couple of weeks I have been crocheting my little heart away. I have finally reached the big payout that I have always been hoping for. I don't want to hold my breath in case things don't pan out, but I was just offered the deal of a life time. A children's book author contacted me and asked if I could crochet a hat sample of his character. He is going to pay me $40 for the sample and if he likes it, he wants to make a contract to make 300 more to sell along with his book. I may be Hiring crocheters soon, I don't know. I will get my full price that I request and he will simply sell them for a little more. I AM EXCITED!!!! This is a deal of a life time to have my work accompany a book. I'm on Cloud 9 right now!
The author was shown a picture of my son wearing his Elmo hat that I finished a short while ago and thought it would be perfect and similar to the one he is wanting. I will make the hat look like anything he wants for this chance of a lifetime. This is the picture he was shown, and the Elmo hat I made my son-- don't mind the messy face, he was eating goldfish :)

I met myself yesterday

I have always known that there was another Nicole Ramage somewhere in Portland. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever think that I would meet her, until yesterday. I was in my literature class and we were asked to interview our table mate and share something interesting about them so that our instructor would be able to remember all 36 of us. It turns out that my table mate, of all the people in the world was also named Nicole Ramage, she was also 26, and had a sun that is 1.5 years old. I was blown away. We didn't look anything alike but apparently, we are doppelgangers nonetheless.
This whole week, as well as next week is over flowing with a million things I need to get done. Today it is work and grocery shopping. I really want some food in my house so that is going to be my number one mission for the day. I also really need to get some work done so that I can have money to do what I like and pay the bills. Surprisingly my page views have been phenomenal for not having worked in 3 days. I really need to get print some coloring pages for my boys to put in their Easter baskets. I helped my sister out this year with picking up Easter for my nephews. I would feel bad if they got nothing-- especially knowing the reason is because someone stole one of their cars and they paid a lot of money to have it repaired-- money that would have gone to their Easter baskets and paying rent. Luckily for them, they don't have to worry about late rent and things like that because their landlord is my sister's brother in law. Their apartment is a complete shit hole and he does nothing to care for the property or the place but they don't seem to mind.
I don't know if my sister is going to be able to bring up the boys to do Easter eggs this year, or where we would do them since I don't have a table of any kind and I'm debating on whether I want to do eggs with Hail this year if they don't come. We don't eat that many hard boiled eggs and he hates eggs and won't even touch them. While egg coloring is fun, it seems like a waste if they won't be eaten afterwards. That, and I think he might be a bit too young to really enjoy it. Who knows. I have a few more days to decide on that one. My biggest concern, worry for this week is going to do the damn dentist. I am going to be terrified and worry over it until it's done and over with. I am allergic to Novocaine so if I have to have any work done they will have to gas me or something. I'm not sure. I just know that I will need a lot of work done and I'm not sure how long it's going to take but I want to get it done. My teeth haven't been hurting so I don't imagine that I have any that are completely rotted, but I know I have a lot of cavities-- after all, I am a baker. I drink far too much caffeine and I don't floss a million times a day.
I finally cleaned out my filing cabinet yesterday too. Man, that was long over due. I had stuff in there from 2005 that I had just been packing around. I also had ex-husband's stuff in there that I no longer see fit to keep. I felt a huge pressure lift when I saw it go in the garbage-- all of it, including the old printer that apparently won't work now cuz I can't get ink for it. It's no matter, the new one that I got is also an HP so it streams with my laptop. It also is very fast and efficient, unlike the last one. Speaking of computers, I need to find a new fan for mine. It seems to be going out and it sounds like a tiny helicopter spinning around in there. I have no idea how to fix something like and whether or not it would be easy but it needs to be done. That is an annoying noise. It has been doing it far less than it was before, but I still don't like to listen to it while I work.

Life update

Lately, it seems that everything has been a little crazy surrounding my business ventures as well as work in general. I have changed my schedule around, work wise, so that I can spend my weekends doing something fun without being overwhelmed. This gives me time to hang out with my kiddo and perhaps do something fun, crochet, and work on other fun projects as well as spend time with my Raph. We have been doing good, although this spring weather has really put a damper on being able to go out and do anything. All the changes with work and now my blogger interface have gotten me all kinds of fuzzled. Yes, I made that up. Work is becoming more of a popularity contest than journalism. Apparently, it is the industry standard to earn barges such as "Read 5 articles," "wrote 5 articles," "logged on." Woopty Do! If you were doing your job, all those things apply anyway. Eventually, all these things are going to mean something, so I simply have to go with the flow whether I like it or not. My page views are doing phenomenal and I will have a great pay check this upcoming payday. I started using twitter this month to promote my work and now I'm being followed by Rachel Ray, Food Network, Martha Stewart, and Parenting Magazine. These are huge successes to me as they have millions of readers and my work is being shared with all those millions. I am nearly done with my first character hat. Hail will love it because it's Elmo, or Memo as he calls him. I posted the question on my FaceBook as to how much someone would be willing to pay for a hat such as this and I only got one response. I feel that I may have to do some research and find out how much others similar to it are selling for. I was thinking of selling the fuzzy ones (like this Elmo Hat) for $20 because the yarn is expensive and I can't guarantee that I will always be able to get it on sale like I did this time. So I had to estimate the cost at full price. With that being said it cost me $7.75 just to make the toddler size hat. Most all other hats are not going to be that expensive because they are not made with furry, expensive yarn. Obviously I want my price to reflect that I am not a factory and I made this from hand. I made a dentist appointment for myself and Hail. I am terrified. I haven't had dental insurance in over 10 years and I know I need work done. the extent of the work is what scares me. Ever since I was a kid, I have been scared of the dentist. When I was 12 and had to have my double canine teeth pulled, those fears were justified when I found out I was allergic to the Novocaine. NOT FUN. This will be Hail's first dentist visit and I hope that it goes well. I have a few concerns that I am hoping I will be able to be relieved of or have fixed at an early age so it doesn't become a problem. It seems, but I can't say for sure because I'm not a dentist, that Hail has a narrow upper jar like my brother and his father have. Both had to have their jaw widened and I know it was significantly more painful as adults. If possible, I would like to have it done sooner so that his teeth grow normally instead of needing to pull those and get braces too. All things I know I can't afford. School starts up again on Monday and I am excited yet not about my classes for this quarter. Classes start at 8 in the morning so Raph will have Hail until nearly 3PM Monday and Wednesday. I have almost three hours between two of my classes, but can't go home to hang out because by the time I got there, it would be time to come back to school which is simply senseless. I am taking an Intro to Fiction course, Writing 121 and a basic sociology course. I know I am going to have a lot of papers to write, so work may be limited, which is also going to severely limit my pay.I know that I will somehow be able to make it work, I am just not happy over the prospect of limiting my funds, as most people are not fans of. I'm still working on my book challenge, although the book I am reading now seems to be dragging on. It is part of a series and like most series in recent years, I read the first three books, then the fourth one is a prequel. Shouldn't that technically be the first book? I don't need back story now after I've already slogged through 3 books and figured it out just fine on my own. Most all my favorite characters are missing that I was hoping would be in those installment. Such is life I guess. I will have to punch through it and move on.

Bummin'

Today I completely have no motivation to do any work. While it it is officially the start of my spring break, a time that I really need to sit down and work AS MUCH AS POSSIBLE, I chose to do some spring cleaning instead. I cleaned out my sons toy box and man, had I have known before I started buying him toys that garbage would be more exciting I would have saved my recycling. In his toy box was a huge stockpile of straws, empty containers, pieces of paper and strings.

I got all my things ready for school so that when I starts again, all I have to do is grab my backpack and go since everything is already inside. My laundry is folded now, my dishes are clean and I was thinking of vacuuming but I can't do that until Hail is asleep. He's terrified of the vacuum.

Last night, I made spaghetti for dinner knowing full well that Hail wasn't going to eat it. His pediatrician keeps telling me that I need to continue to give him things to try, but I have had about 20 failed attempts with sketti until last night. He didn't eat the meat but he did soak up as much sauce as he could and ate all the noodles. This is the face that I ended up with when he was close to done.

I love Easter

I have always loved Easter. I'm not one of those super religious people that insists on church and christenings and things like that on Easter. Our family has always done Easter baskets, the cute bunnies, chicks, and ducks, have fun with eggs and that sort of thing. Yesterday while I was out and about, I stopped at Wal-Mart, something I should have learned a long time ago that I shouldn't be allowed to do, and picked up a few things for Hail's Easter basket.

Last year, he was too young to really care about Easter, but this year, now that he is a little bigger, kind of understands gift giving and can have a little candy, we are going all out. I found a super cute shirt that I couldn't resist picking up since he is growing like a weed and I can't keep clothes on him. Of course, a new Hot Wheel car was necessary since he is a little boy and there is nothing cooler than cars. And I picked up two movies from the $5 bin. I love that $5 bin, there are so many great movies in it that I have seen a million times over but would gladly watch a million more. He will be getting Thomas the Train and a Sesame Street count with me movie. I still have a few more things I have to pick up such as a basket and a few filler items. But then his basket is finished.

We are going to be making Jello eggs this year since nobody really eats hard boiled eggs in our house and they end up going bad. Jello eggs are easy, and they make an awesome sugar free snack. I also wrote this great tutorial about dying Easter eggs with Kool-Aid. I don't know why I never thought of that before. I would much prefer fruity smells to vinegar in the kitchen! Here's the tutorial for anyone that wants to try it at home.

Getting up early is so hard to do

When I was younger, I had absolutely no qualms of getting up at 6 in the morning for school, 5 was even acceptable as long as I had gone to bed before 11. Now, I can't do it to save my life. I set the alarm, I wake up to turn it off but for some reason I have every excuse in the world as to why I can't get up then. This mornings excuse I told myself as I dragged myself out of bed is that it's cold in the living room and Raph was snoring all night so I couldn't possibly get up because I didn't sleep well. Not sleeping well is always the excuse I use. Admittedly, most nights I don't sleep well. I wake up to most every noise, it takes me forever to get to sleep and then when I do I have insomnia and I'm wide awake for hours in the middle of the night.

When I wake up, aside from getting up to use the bathroom, I don't get up and do productive things because I know if I were to get up I will fall back to sleep for a long time and I can't afford to do that since Hail will be up at 8 in the morning. For some reason my child likes to be up early in the morning and not stay up at night. I don't know where he got that from as I am not a morning person and it stays relatively dark here in his room until about 8:30 9 in the morning.

Hopefully, this new Silver Spur cowboy coffee I bought will do the trick. It is STRONG. Seriously, as much coffee as I am used to drinking, I haven't even finished my first cup and it feels like I've been kicked in the teeth by a horse. I think one cup will be fine for now. I do love coffee though. Such a delicious invention....

Time for carnival!

You know the old saying, "rain, rain, go away, come again some other day?" Well, this weekend would be a perfect time for that. This weekend we are have a carnival down the street that we would love to take Hail to. We are still planning on going even if it rains, because that's what it does here in Portland, but it would be nicer if it wasn't pouring.

When Raph took him past the carnival on the bus he showed a huge interest in getting to ride some of the rides, and perhaps win a few stuffed animals. It's a small carnival and I know we wouldn't be there long but it definitely would get us out of the house, something that we could all benefit from.

Our Play Date at the Park-- Picture Heavy

Today we had a play date at Ed Benedict park. We had lots of fun with our new friends. Here's what our day looked like.

Yay! We're at the park today to play with our new friends.

First, I went down the slide with mommy.

Then I played "chase" with my new friend Adam at the park.

Yay, I can finally run!

When I got tired, I stopped to rest and pick a flower for mommy. Then I ate it.

I got to swing by myself. Weeeeee!

Then I went down the little slide by myself, backwards.

Then I tried to climb back up the slide.

That was my day at the park, I hope that you enjoyed it as much as I did!

Taking Hail to the Dr. Today

We're getting ready to go to Hail's dr. appointment. I made an appointment for him because he seems to always be hungry but isn't eating anything. He stores his food all around the house instead of putting it in his little body. It worries me some but he isn't losing weight. I just need to know for my own peace of mind that he is nutritionally sound. We are also going to get some vaccines today... that's the not fun part.

Super frustrated

*sigh* It never seems to fail that after months of complaining that nobody sees Hail and weeks of promises that grandma or someone would like to take him for the weekend, they call the last minute with an excuse as to why they cannot. It frustrates me to no end that he gets hurt like this because someone has changed their mind, or someone else in the family is more important. Not to mention, it would be nice to have some time to myself every once in awhile.

I hate seeing his face when after being told he gets to go to grandma's for the weekend that now he is not. Luckily he is young enough that he doesn't really understand what is going on and that he isn't super affected by it yet. Luckily I had a backup plan for the weekend since I knew this was going to end up happening. It just frustrates me to no end that everyone complains and makes it sound like it is my fault they aren't getting to visit him when really, they are the ones that have canceled. I feel as if I don't even want to be bothered with asking or making attempts any longer. I feel like it is useless to pack up his stuff or even tell him he gets to go until someone shows up on my doorstep and says, "Is he ready to go?"

I just see a sad pattern beginning to happen that I am all too familiar with from childhood. I don't want that for Hail and I feel so thankful for his other family-- the "family" of Raph that Hail has chosen to adopt and who has adopted him as their own. It seems anytime that we call upon them for a night out to dinner or a few hours to grocery shop that someone is always there to watch him. It just seems so sad to me that his birth family can't do the same. Really, the only ones being hurt by this is them. Hail has already figured out on his own, at 17 months, whom he wants to call family and does.

Limits Testing

Today has been a very trying day for me. Now that Hail can walk, he has decided that testing the limits to EVERYTHING is the way to go. Things he knew he couldn't do last week, he has decided that it is okay to try. I have tried everything from smacking his hand, telling him no, putting him in time out and spanking his bottom. I really wouldn't mind so much if he was only doing things that annoyed me, but he wants to test the limits with things that are dangerous. Like today alone, he tried to crawl over the top of the couch- backwards, he was standing up on his toddler bed and almost fell over backwards and smacked his head on the railing, tried to stick his finger in the fan-while running, and then tried to inhale his fork at dinner time.

My telling him no has no effect on the situation regardless of how I choose to discipline him. He laughs at me, continues what he is doing or moves onto the next dangerous button pushing act. Raph is usually the one that has to finally step in and discipline him before he listens. I don't know if it is the deep voice or what but I don't want this to be a constant issue where he is the only one he will listen to when discipline is concerned. Not only am I afraid that he is going to get hurt from not listening to me and continuing on his way, but I don't want him to be afraid of Raph because all he thinks he does is discipline him. I really don't know where to go with this one or how to resolve it. It is not as if I am shirking the disciplining duty on someone else, he just doesn't listen to me. I really hope that this is not the beginning of bad teenage behavior starting at 16.5 months.

Have You Ever Had One of Those Days?

I am having one of those days today where I feel like doing nothing; and that's about how much I've done. I did go to school... and fell asleep in class. I finished my homework after I finally figured out what I was supposed to be doing. Then, Hail and I watched Rio for the 546 time. He loves that movie so much. He loves to shake his booty and dance like nobody's watching. Just this morning he was dancing like nobody's business and smacked his head of the coffee table, giving himself a huge goose egg. He just kept dancing like it didn't matter.

I have been trying to work on a few articles but I keep getting distracted and can't focus on things. I keep thinking that my list of ideas to write about is getting shorter-- I write most all for revenue share, so my articles need to be within topic as well as evergreen or holiday related so that I can make money on them each year. I don't want to work on my other CBS article yet because the first one hasn't been reviewed yet and I would really like the feedback so that I know more about what they are looking for. I didn't do the orientation before they gave me articles and although I have told them this several times they kept handing me articles!

Maybe I'll just take the rest of the night off and work on gaining some ideas so that I can start fresh tomorrow. It's my Friday tonight.

Happy Valentine's Day!!

Well it's that day again, probably the most undivided day of the year; 25% like Valentine's Day, the other 75% hide in the house and avoid going out if they can. Today is my nephew's 4th birthday. Happy Birthday Anthony!!!!

Personally, I'm a little mixed up about this Valentine's Day. While I have a sweetheart, the older one won't be home from school until 11PM and Hail is grouchy from teething. Also, I suspect that he has been getting up in the middle of the night to play now that he's in his big boy bed. (I woke up in the middle of the night hearing, "weee, weee, weeee!") So my Valentine's Day is coning to consist of homework by myself, watching Teen Mom 2. I have a weird/sick fascination with that show. I know it is all drama and teen issues but I can't stop watching.

On the up side, I got my first two assignments for CBS. I am freaking out about it because one of them is due Thursday and I haven't written to a specific format/deadline in months. I feel like I'm a little rusty!

I Love Valentine's Day

The feel of love is in the air in my home, for many reasons more than simply because Valentine's Day is near. My house is most always full of love. Raph and I don't argue, Hail listens most all the time as long as he is kept busy, and everyone is in a happy mood most all the time. I think I just love being in love and having people around me to love. :)

This is going to be Hail's first Valentine's Day that is will be able to remember. While at Winco the other day, he saw Elmo valentines he liked, so we will be filling them out this weekend and giving them out to people. He was so excited to see those cute Elmo cards. I hope that he really enjoys the feeling of people expressing their gratitude toward a simple gesture of a Valentine. It is a wonderful feeling when someone appreciates you and the time you took to think of them. I think he really does understand that. He shows it in simple ways such as never being able to stop at blowing only one kiss. He has to blow everyone several kisses and gives huge smiles between each one. When he gives you a hug, he is never happy with just wrapping his arms around you. He has to pat you on the back too.

This Valentine's Day, I will be spending it with Hail since Raph has his night class to go to. I am excited over the prospect of having someone to love nonetheless. Someone that loves me and appreciates the things I do, even if it is simply cooking dinner, or leaving a light on if I go to bed early. Raph is my sweetheart. I love him and I know that he not only loves me but he loves Hail too and that is what matters most to me.

Here's a picture of my two sweethearts. This was taken in April of last year.

He Told me No

Most days, I find my son to be a very sweet child. He loves to play, give hugs and kisses and snuggle with you on the couch. What seems like completely out of nowhere, Hail told me no he wouldn't do something I asked. Not only this, he threw his bowl of applesauce on the floor when I told him to finish eating. I would like to blame it on his being sick, but I know this defiance comes from somewhere else. I believe we may be approaching the terrible twos. I have been told that this stage of life is called that because it happens for two years not just because they are two. Here's crossing my fingers to the fact that that isn't true.