Sunday, April 29, 2012

50 Book Challenge- Book 14- Water for Elephants

For those that haven't read this book, you need to. I thought this book was absolutely amazing. After Jacob's parents are killed in a car accident, he finds out that his dad's veterinary practice he has been going to school to join is so broke that the bank owns it and the house. Left with nothing, Jacob joins the Benzini Brother's Most Spectacular Show in the World circus train and begins traveling the country.

At first, nobody is sure of his place until they find out that he has vet experience. His first job is to kill one of the show horses that has gone lame. From there, he treats the lion with no teeth, Bobo the chimp, and then a bull elephant is purchased when another circus collapses. Everyone thinks that Rosie, the elephant is stupid until they find out that she only speaks Polish.

There is a tangled love affair between the vet, the lead performer, and the equestrian director, also her husband. There are midgets, rowdy old men, cooch girls, and a handful of other characters that are brilliant in their telling.

I loved this story, throughout the entire read, I could easily picture myself traveling on the train, in the menagerie, or eating in the grease tent. This is a fantastic tale about love, compassion, and being free. It is a fairly quick read but it will leave you wanting more. After looking it up, most of the details are based in truth and really did happen on a traveling circus in America. I won't tell you the details, but it is some fascinating stuff.

Monday, April 16, 2012

50 book challenge-Book 13- The Invisible Ring

This is the 13th book I have read for my challenge, and it is also the 4th Anne Bishop book that I have read. It is the 4th book of the Black Jewels series and I have to say, this has been my least favorite. It took me FOREVER to get through because none of the characters are the same, it was difficult to get into because it is actually a prequel that should have been the first book. The book is called the Invisible Ring and doesn't have much to do with a ring at all.

While the plot of the story was decent,it took forever to get to. It started as a story of a journey to buy slaves, then you find out that the person purchasing the slaves isn't whom she is supposed to be, and they have a spy amongst them. Unfortunately, the story isn't as exciting as I just made it sound. I hope that the next book is going to be much better. I feel that had this story started as the first in the series as I feel that it should have been, the story would have flowed better. There are suck rich characters in the main series that I missed them throughout the whole series.

Friday, April 6, 2012


My dentist appointment went better than expected yesterday. I was hoping to get some of the dental work done that I need but they simply just did x-rays to tell me what is wrong with my teeth. I nearly laughed when they said I need braces. There is no way that I can afford that!For 10 years of not having any dental insurance, I feel that I fared pretty well. I have 13 cavities, which I expected, and I have to have one tooth (a wisdom tooth) removed because it is pushing against the rest of my lower teeth. The only problem with this is that they are going to have to take a piece of my jaw with it. Also, I have to have a deep cleaning which will be done in 4 parts because they have to numb me to scrape the calcium deposits from under my gums that are starting to solidify and swelling my gums. Overall, it's going to be 9 visits in total to have all the work done that I need. And unfortunately, the first appointment that I could get to get the work started isn't until the 20th.
Grandma's funeral is irritating me. There was a private burial for her yesterday that not even the entire family was invited to. Then her memorial service is Saturday which everyone is invited to. Why would you hold a burial and only allow a handful of people to attend, and not even the whole family? People have made this far more difficult than it needed to be.
My mom has sold her house and will be moving to Minnesota in a few short weeks. Sunday, we will be saying our goodbyes. I fell like I am having a personal funeral myself. While my mother and I may never have been super close, besides my sister and brother, she is the only family that I have left. My sister will be following her because she is attached to the hip of my mother. My little brother and I have never been close; he is 7 years younger than I am and he is autistic, so his needs have always seemingly distanced us because of the education he needed, and health problems. We are going Easter to clear out what we want from her house and hopefully have a decent visit. I feel so overwhelmed with the whole situation that, frankly, I want to curl up under a blanket and stay there until it's over. I don't like the helpless/hopeless alone feeling I have. while I really am not alone-- I have Hail and Raph (whom, since we are not married could leave whenever he chooses)I still feel it. Not to mention, I have a million things going on this month which has prompted me to be in high gear consistently, but not really have any time to do anything or feel anything I'm consistently on "go" mode.

Thursday, April 5, 2012

Dreading this day

Today is the dreaded dentist. I am not looking forward to this at all. I am scared of the dentist and have been since I was a little girl. When I was 8 the dentist tried to remove my double Eye teeth and I wouldn't let him because he wasn't clear as to what he was planning on doing. Then the last time I had dental insurance, I was 15 years ago, and I found out I was allergic to Novocaine. I had to have 4 cavities filled with no medicinal help to ease the pain. I will never do that again. I am told that they do things differently now,and I hope that is true because the drilling was always something I liked least of all. That movie, The Dentist, from the mid 80s early 90s scared the crap out of me. I know that I have cavities that need to be filled and more than likely 1-2 teeth that need to be pulled. If they don't do some of the work today, then I can't honestly say the likeliness of my going back to get it does is very high. I also am not looking forward to the lecture I know I will receive. I know I shouldn't drink dark soda, and coffee but I am addicted to them. I quit smoking so I don't need that lecture but I do not floss nearly as often as I should and I haven't had insurance in so long that I am sure my teeth aren't that great. I AM RIDDLED WITH ANXIETY!!!!

Wednesday, April 4, 2012

Happy Dance

The last couple of weeks I have been crocheting my little heart away. I have finally reached the big payout that I have always been hoping for. I don't want to hold my breath in case things don't pan out, but I was just offered the deal of a life time. A children's book author contacted me and asked if I could crochet a hat sample of his character. He is going to pay me $40 for the sample and if he likes it, he wants to make a contract to make 300 more to sell along with his book. I may be Hiring crocheters soon, I don't know. I will get my full price that I request and he will simply sell them for a little more. I AM EXCITED!!!! This is a deal of a life time to have my work accompany a book. I'm on Cloud 9 right now!
The author was shown a picture of my son wearing his Elmo hat that I finished a short while ago and thought it would be perfect and similar to the one he is wanting. I will make the hat look like anything he wants for this chance of a lifetime. This is the picture he was shown, and the Elmo hat I made my son-- don't mind the messy face, he was eating goldfish :)

Tuesday, April 3, 2012

I met myself yesterday

I have always known that there was another Nicole Ramage somewhere in Portland. Never in my wildest dreams would I ever think that I would meet her, until yesterday. I was in my literature class and we were asked to interview our table mate and share something interesting about them so that our instructor would be able to remember all 36 of us. It turns out that my table mate, of all the people in the world was also named Nicole Ramage, she was also 26, and had a sun that is 1.5 years old. I was blown away. We didn't look anything alike but apparently, we are doppelgangers nonetheless.
This whole week, as well as next week is over flowing with a million things I need to get done. Today it is work and grocery shopping. I really want some food in my house so that is going to be my number one mission for the day. I also really need to get some work done so that I can have money to do what I like and pay the bills. Surprisingly my page views have been phenomenal for not having worked in 3 days. I really need to get print some coloring pages for my boys to put in their Easter baskets. I helped my sister out this year with picking up Easter for my nephews. I would feel bad if they got nothing-- especially knowing the reason is because someone stole one of their cars and they paid a lot of money to have it repaired-- money that would have gone to their Easter baskets and paying rent. Luckily for them, they don't have to worry about late rent and things like that because their landlord is my sister's brother in law. Their apartment is a complete shit hole and he does nothing to care for the property or the place but they don't seem to mind.
I don't know if my sister is going to be able to bring up the boys to do Easter eggs this year, or where we would do them since I don't have a table of any kind and I'm debating on whether I want to do eggs with Hail this year if they don't come. We don't eat that many hard boiled eggs and he hates eggs and won't even touch them. While egg coloring is fun, it seems like a waste if they won't be eaten afterwards. That, and I think he might be a bit too young to really enjoy it. Who knows. I have a few more days to decide on that one. My biggest concern, worry for this week is going to do the damn dentist. I am going to be terrified and worry over it until it's done and over with. I am allergic to Novocaine so if I have to have any work done they will have to gas me or something. I'm not sure. I just know that I will need a lot of work done and I'm not sure how long it's going to take but I want to get it done. My teeth haven't been hurting so I don't imagine that I have any that are completely rotted, but I know I have a lot of cavities-- after all, I am a baker. I drink far too much caffeine and I don't floss a million times a day.
I finally cleaned out my filing cabinet yesterday too. Man, that was long over due. I had stuff in there from 2005 that I had just been packing around. I also had ex-husband's stuff in there that I no longer see fit to keep. I felt a huge pressure lift when I saw it go in the garbage-- all of it, including the old printer that apparently won't work now cuz I can't get ink for it. It's no matter, the new one that I got is also an HP so it streams with my laptop. It also is very fast and efficient, unlike the last one. Speaking of computers, I need to find a new fan for mine. It seems to be going out and it sounds like a tiny helicopter spinning around in there. I have no idea how to fix something like and whether or not it would be easy but it needs to be done. That is an annoying noise. It has been doing it far less than it was before, but I still don't like to listen to it while I work.

Monday, April 2, 2012

First day of the quarter

Today is the first day of the quarter. It has been an overwhelming day too. I finally got a printer that works. I was going to simply buy ink for the printer but I found that that wasn't possible as they discontinued the kind that I need. Go figure. I had no other choice but to get a new printer. Admittedly, when I got home, I went a little print happy. Hail wanted to see what it did so I printed him a coloring page with Elmo. Then I printed off all the patterns I had found online that I wanted to try. That was satisfying--- not having to write them all down by hand. All of my classes seem to be decent so far; however, I failed to see when I made my schedule that an English class and a writing course were going to equal a LOT OF HOMEWORK. By Wednesday alone, I have nearly 100 pages to read, and I have a paper to write and a discussion post to do.
I found out that Hail's sperm donor is in jail. I don't have any idea what I saw in him. He never treated me that great and I divorced within two years. He was already waiting on 4 felonies, and now, he's in jail for domestic violence and harassment. Good Grief!It's not my problem now. I am debating whether I should terminate his visitation as he has technically abandoned Hail since that's the way in Washington. Also, I refuse to take him to jail EVER to see his father. It's such a hard decision. Ultimately, I feel that the best for Hail would be to not allow his father to see him as his current charges are stories I know all to well.
I haven't done any work today as I have been all kinds of busy trying to get things figured out. It's gonna keep me busy these 3 classes. And to keep up with work as well, and be able to do my crafty stuff I want, I am really going to push myself to get it done. My schedule is so full this week, I have something going on every day for nearly the next two weeks. The most dreaded thing on my list is the dentist... I AM TERRIFIED OF THE DENTIST. I haven't had dental insurance since I was 15- over 11 years ago and just from looking in my own mouth, I can tell you that at minimum, I have a ton of cavities to take care of. On top of that, I am pretty sure I have at least 2 teeth that need to be removed, possibly one root canal, and in general, I don't want to listen to the lecture that I know I'm going to receive.
I really think, as it is so late that I need to take the rest of the day off, regroup and pick it up tomorrow when I don't have school. I can do this, I will do this, and I will do it well, no matter how difficult it becomes.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Say a little prayer

Well, it has been a long hard road, but Raph's grandma passed on last night. Please say a prayer for their family. I find the whole ordeal to be quite unnecessary in many aspects. She was being cared for by his aunt-- she lived in their home. When she felt that it was getting to be too much she simply stopped giving her proper care. She paid no mind to the fact that she needed a low sodium diet, which caused fluid to build up in her lungs. She wasn't eating because she knew it was going to make her sick and because she wasn't eating she was becoming delusional and wasn't sleeping. Each time this would happen, she would be placed in hospice for a week at a time where they were release her once she was doing better.
The doctors would say,"well there isn't anything we can do," instead of trying to put her on an IV and give her nourishment that way. They wanted to turn off her pace maker and let her go when her heart would stop. The woman had the worst care. Unfortunately, Raph and I couldn't care for her with a 1.5 years old and living on the 3rd story, she'd never make it up and down the stairs, she could barely walk as it was she was so frail. The overall care and treatment that she received makes me want to hurt somebody, honestly. I feel she suffered far more than was necessary. Raph's sister and mom couldn't care for as they care for their ailing grandpa who lives with them. His sisters are still in high school and his mom works 12 hour shifts. The care she needed round the clock and she wasn't getting it. She should have been put in a nursing home instead of a hospice. Had she have gotten the care she needed, she would have lived longer.
I am really surprised that Raph isn't grieving the way I would have thought. His grandma and he were really close when he was younger. Until the last couple of years he saw her daily and would go to church with her every Sunday. His theory is that there is no use getting upset about people passing on because it happens every day. While I do agree and find this to be true, I know when my grandpa died, I bawled like a baby for days. He didn't see his grandma in her final hours, but he did shed a few tears when he got the call. Then went back to playing video games and killing zombies. I suppose that we all grieve differently, and it's an important thing tool to have.
For today, my prayers go out to the Whitfield family and those that knew Emma Whitfield.

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